This Week at Camp

I got my first package of the year at Oakcrest this week!!! Woot! I was really excited. I opened the package to find this:

I was a little confused until I read the note.

 

So I got four hugs this week from four of my favorite people in the whole world. 

 

  Ella, Preston, Brennen, and Griffin. Best package ever. I didn't know how much I needed this until I got it. And Preston cheered up a homesick camper this week by giving her a big hug. I love my family.

Rapid Pace

Things change FAST in life. This week things have changed profoundly. Everything fell apart and now everything is being put back together. So here's the deal, I AM doing Oakcrest. If you read a certain post that I posted earlier this week and have since taken down, things have changed again, and I am spending my summer at the happiest place on Earth. Done. 

Next change. I am not going on a mission in August. But I AM going on a mission in December/January. At least as far as I know. Like we've witnessed this week, things can always change. But that's the plan for now. And my Stake President can put my mission call on hold so I can most likely go to the same mission that I was called to go to for August. And in case you didn't hear where that is, its CALIFORNIA FRESNO SPANISH SPEAKING. I'm pumped. But I'll just have to wait a little longer. No biggie. 

So you might ask, "Then what are you doing between August and December?" I am going to be sticking around Provo one more semester. I'm not finished with my master's program so I'm going to finish up the coursework I have left for that.

Things can change in an instant. And all we can do is be grateful when things work out. And have faith when they don't. Lucky me, things have turned out ok. I am one blessed little girl. 

So that's whats going on in my life. I will live in Provo a little longer. And hey, four more months to find a husband right? :) If you know me at all you will hear the sarcasm in that last sentence.

This story was given at a BYU devotional the week I came to visit, a year before I started my program. Its one of my favorites:
At first I saw God as an observer, like my judge, keeping track of things I did wrong. This way, God would know whether I merited heaven or hell when I died. He was always out there, sort of like the President. I recognized His picture when I saw it, but I didn’t really know Him at all. But later on, when I recognized my higher power better, it seemed as though life was rather like a bike ride, on a tandem bike, and I noticed God was in the back helping me pedal.
I don’t know when it was that He suggested we change places, but life has not been the same since... When I had control, I knew the way. It was rather boring but predictable. It was always the shortest distance between the points. But when He took the lead, He knew delightful cuts, up mountains, and through rocky places and at breakneck speeds; it was all I could do to hang on! Even though it looked like madness, He [said], “Pedal!”
I worried and became anxious, asking, “Where are you taking me?” He just laughed and didn’t answer, and I found myself starting to trust. I soon forgot my boring life and entered into the adventure, and when I’d say, “I’m scared,” He’d lean back and touch my hand. He took me to people with gifts that I needed; gifts of healing, acceptance and joy. They gave me their gifts to take on my journey. Our journey, that is, God’s and mine. And we were off again. He said, “Give the gifts away, they’re extra baggage, too much weight.” So I did, to the people we met, and I found that in giving I received, and still our burden was light. I did not trust Him at first, in control of my life. I thought He’d wreck it. But He knew bike secrets, knew how to make it bend to take sharp corners, jump to clear places filled with rocks, fly to shorten scary passages.
And I’m learning to [be quiet] and pedal in the strangest places, and I’m beginning to enjoy the view and the cool breeze on my face with my delightful constant companion, my higher power. And when I’m sure I can’t go on anymore, He just smiles and says, “Pedal . . .”

So, when all I can do is pedal, I do. And I know that he is in control and I can go down paths which he has sent me. So that's what I'm doing. And already I have been given gifts and given some of them away. But always there is peace, and my burdens are light.

Not Yet...

No call yet. 

But you'll be happy to hear, my nausea has subsided. I'm just excited and peaceful now. Thus I can be patient a little longer. But I hope not too much longer :)

I Can't Take It Anymore!

I put my mission papers in a week ago. Judging by when a few of my friends have gotten their calls I should get my call on Wednesday. LONGEST WEEK AND A HALF OF MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!! I think about it all day. I dream about it at night. There's no escape. 

 

If it doesn't come on Wednesday, I'm gonna lose it. Go totally bonkers. I'm not sure if this madness filling up inside of me is excitement, or fear, or doubt, or joy, or nerves, or what! All I know is I need to throw up pretty much all the time. I know, TMI. 

Wednesday. 3 days. I can do it. 

Everyone Needs to See This

I found this today. And I love it. 

Tender Mercies

For some reason I have developed this weird habit of storing important pictures on flash drives. I don't know why I do it. I just always have since high school.

I had a flash drive that was devoted to my Oakcrest 2010 pictures. One day about 8 months ago I was looking for this flash drive and could not find it anywhere. Knowing that this had all my pictures from one of the most important experiences of my life on it, I cried. I thought it was lost forever. I knelt in prayer asking/pleading/more of begging Heavenly Father to help me find my ever so important flash drive with pictures of all of my children (children meaning campers) on it. I believe I said the words "PLEASE! Just let it turn up SOMEWHERE! ANYWHERE! As long as I know where it is."

I continued looking and no luck.

About 3 days later my roommate got an email from a missionary in Belgium who she had recently sent a package to. The email asked why she sent him a flash drive with pictures of girls at some camp on it. Belgium! What are the chances?! I guess somehow it fell into the package or something. It definitely showed up SOMEWHERE.

Over the past months my roommate has asked him about this flash drive and we've heard no other word on the matter. Until a few weeks ago. HE STILL HAS IT!!! He just needs an address to send it to. I could not be more grateful. Pictures are one of those things I would protect with my life! Maybe not my life. But they mean a lot to me.

Sunshine Reminds Me Of...

It is so nice outside!!! It is wonderful. This weather gets me excited. But not for the reason you might think. Yes, it means I get to play outside all day long which is exciting. But more than that, it means a new adventure is beginning. Whenever summer weather begins it means the end of one section of a chapter and the beginning of another. And for me, this year it is the beginning of the last few paragraphs of a chapter that is closing. And that means the end of my time in Provo and at BYU.

Goodbyes are a long process for me (can you tell? After all I am already thinking about it and I still have 3 months of school left). They are long and sad, but I am really good at goodbyes. When the fact that I am leaving a part of my life sets in, I am sad and I know that I will miss what I am leaving. But as soon as I leave it behind, I am excited and ready for the next adventure. There is little dwindling or pining for what once was or missing what I once had. When I left Portsmouth 2 years ago, it was a sad moment. It was like I was leaving a part of me behind. I had my day of reverence for that beautiful place that changed my life, but the next I was ready to be on the road to Utah!

I am finishing seeing clients and I am in the last semester of actual classes. My time is ending. But when this phase of my life is over, I'm going to Oakcrest! And then I'm going on a mission! What more could I ask for?!

This goodbye is not as hard as others have been (not yet at least). The past two years have by far been the hardest of my life. My soul has been shaken several times. The things I thought would always be constant in my life amidst an ever changing world, I let go of. It has not been pretty. But, of course everything works out in the end. And among the very low points were shining and ever bright high points. And I want to remember every bit of it. Good. Bad. All. It has been two years of becoming.

Now I get to finish out the grad school phase with a bang! Live up having LDS roommates that are my age (which I will probably never have again) and all the goofy and fun things BYU Mormon culture has to offer. I am one luck girl. Sometimes the shadows of life come and block our view of the glorious road just beyond the shadow. But guess what. My shadow is gone, and I'm moving forward to a beautiful mountain.
Literally, the mountains of Kamas, UT where I will spend my summer

P.S. WE HAVE A STAFF FOR OAKCREST!!!!!!!!!!! We hired most of our fantastic staff over the weekend and I cannot wait to meet all of them again and have an amazing summer with them!